10 May 2011

Walk with the dogs tonight, in suburbia

Ten things people say to me as I walk our village streets with three Basset hounds:

1: "I bet you're the one being taken for a walk, aren't you?"

2: "Are they sausage dogs?"

3: "By, you've got your hands full there!"

4: "I bet those ears are a bugger to clean."

5: "Are they beagles?"

6: "We had a Westie once. Died, it did."*

7: "They must be related to each other."

8: "Are they spaniels?"

9: "What happened to the other one?"

10: " ................. "**

* Okay, so only one person says this, but we bump into him a lot on our walks, and he tells us about his deceased Westie every single time.
** By some distance this is the most common. The number of people who walk past us without looking us in the eye, let alone saying anything, is quite unnerving.


John Medd said...

We visited family over Easter and while everyone was at Church on Sunday I was tasked with walking the dog. As a cat person I thought I would be rumbled as soon as I walked out of the front door - but no! I was welcomed into the dog walking fraternity with open arms; I was questioned about the FLSMM* as if I was its rightful owner, indeed I created a whole back story for the mutt as clearly he was in no position to contradict me. Can I just say, I like dogs?

* 4-legged sh*t making machine

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Anonymous said...

We have two labradors and frequented a well-known supermarket chain to purchase their food (this was when they were going through their 'Pedigree Chum'. It didn't last. Happily). Young, big, active dogs = lots of food. Every time we went into aforementioned well-known supermarket chain to buy copious tins of the product, we were greeted EVERY TIME by the same refrain by the clearly particularly stupid checkout females (and it WAS almost exclusively females that said it), "Have you got dogs, then?" On one occasion, when feeling particularly - and it must be said, uncharacteristically - playful, I replied, "No. I run a pie shop and we're out of meat pies". The disturbing thing is that she belived me...